The History of [His]tory - 5/30/09

Nothing but candor in this...any comments would be appreciated.

There are times...
Times where I just sit and think,
Watching the hands of time circulate
Wondering how I can circumvent,
Get by time...get by Father Time?
Nah...
Not on his watch, his eyes impeccable
Not on his watch, its timekeeping ineffable
And so the time I spend seems taxed
With the remuneration being faith in self...
Thought is the mortar,
With which I've built the man before you
But time is that which eviscerates he,
Me,
And leaves but a shell...
Time is like a trait to a degenerative disease,
Causing dis-ease that burgeons into so much more,
So much for, that mindset of mine
That I'm confident and fine
And will grow to love myself in time
All swept away leaving barely a sign
Because in time I don't think I'll find,
The one for me...
Irony is it, that I've expected something from time
That I could never believe in my mind,
All the while trying to get rid of it
Yet somehow savoring every bit of it....
To find it hard to conceive,
More or less believe,
That someone could be romantically interested in me
Is horrible, yet it is the case,
As time seems to find, a way to get behind my face
Into that place, the sanctum of self-worth
And raze what I've worked so hard to raise...
Which brings me to the paradox:
Time has generated the thoughts that make me complete
Yet time has generated the thoughts that leave me effete.

-A. Lewis