Thursday, July 30, 2015

5:04 AM

They say timing is everything.
I suppose that's why
Us having something
Feels like it will end up as nothing at all.
They say you have to walk before you crawl.
We've been sprinting since we met,
And neither of us is tired yet.
The whirlwind has swept away the cobwebs,
Dashed away any doubts,
And made us dizzy with delight.
Texts sent upon awaking,
And we fall asleep on the phone at night.
Why am I left with the feeling
That it's all just too right?
They say if it's too good to be true...
Well, you know the rest.
Why second-guess the best?
You make all others seem like second-best.
My heart beats so rapidly around you,
Folks would still hear it if I had a second chest.
The time we spend together is amazing;
Our time apart is an exercise in patience.
I just always want to be with you,
Basking in this infatuation.
I love how you incite my imagination.
..but I hate the occasional bouts of trepidation.
Wondering when the high will end,
When reality will snap back into place.
I just know the Hands of Time
Are ready to slap us across the face.
We're both young,
With so many places to go.
While the fire is strong between us,
There just isn't a stable place for it to grow.
That's why we continue to fall.
Convinced we can have it all,
When we can't even reach solid ground.
It won't be easy when we finally do come down,
We'll just have to deal when that time comes around.
I know they say timing is everything.
I suppose that's why
Us having something
Feels like it's better than nothing at all.
Time may run out on us, but at least we started our clock.
In a time of lackadaisical effort, we've given it all we've got.
No matter the ending, we had quite a run.
You'll always be special, even when it's said and done.


Sunday, June 28, 2015

Handwritten - 6/26/15

Let's go where wi-fi can't reach us, and practice real connectivity.
Leave the touchscreens, and find out about real levels of sensitivity.
Social media didn't ruin relationships,
And neither did technology.
However, both have changed how we communicate,
Which has affect our methodology.
Thanks to notifications, we're afraid to speak first or text twice.
Too busy worrying about how things might look,
Rather than what feels right.
Desiring companionship is considered everything but normal,
And often associated with weakness,
Yet people wonder why their outlooks are peppered with bleakness.
Profiles are facades, no matter how honest they are.
Without feeling our energy, no one can truly know who we really are.
Text messages lose the quality of tone;
Without it, the intended emotions and feelings are gone.
People are left with mere perception alone,
Which leads to misunderstandings aplenty.
I don't mean to imply that texts are empty,
But they often complicate conversations that could be had simply.
Beyond the tweets and messages,
Beyond the likes and comments,
There are deeper levels of connection;
The ones that make sparks fly like comets.
Rather than refresh feeds and pages,
We should be refreshing our minds and spirits in compelling places.
Mutual friends are cool, but what about connecting through mutual beliefs?
Rather than similar relationship goals,
What about mutual ambitions, and a desire to see each other succeed?
Seems like we focus on what we see on screens,
Which is ineffective, since we all curate those things.
Instead, we should be seeking admissions only heard in moments undressed by trust.
Meaningful facts that have to be bared.
We all choose what we share, but filters disappear when we care.
Our raw selves are rough, but our flaws are what make us perfect.
Requiring effort and understanding makes us worth it.
Conversation is a lost art; let's unearth it.
There are feelings to be felt that defy wording;
There are beautiful times to be had, and we all deserve it.


Saturday, June 27, 2015

Interested (In You) - 6/27/15

May my intentions reach your heart clearly,
And my actions speak loudly enough for your trust to hear me.
I understand that you have guards up,
But I'm not in the business of knocking walls down.
Instead of demolition, I hope I'm in a position
Where I make you laugh until the blockade falls down.
Of course I want you physically;
That's a part of attraction.
However, seeing you smile,
And being your spare calm when things get wild,
Mean more than providing sexual satisfaction.
...although I do plan on offering that in spades.
The thing is,
Sex too soon can lead to emotional escapades,
Since it escalates feelings exponentially:
From "we're just talking,"
To twitter and instagram stalking, instantly.
I'd much rather practice romance and friendship consistently,
Build on that consistency,
And see if our hearts begin to yearn for each other more insistently.
We can even both begin with options,
As long it's agreed that when sharing is no longer optional, we drop them.
Whatever it takes to see this through.
As the saying goes, I've got a love jones for you.
I'd be humbly thrilled to see you shine and grow in my light and love,
But for now, you're just the one I'm thinking of.
I look forward to getting to know you, and I mean that sincerely.
May my intentions reach your heart clearly,
And my actions speak loudly enough for your trust to hear me.


Sunday, May 17, 2015

3:18 AM

No matter how great a night turns out...
Before the lights turn out,
You'll creep up on me.
Getting home and chilling alone,
The events of the night slowly fade.
Despite the memories made,
I find myself thinking about you.
What's a good time without you?
It's always great to see you enjoy yourself;
Our great times are unlike any else.
I'd love to share my fun,
Seeing as I don't share these thoughts.
I'll just go shower, and get in the bed,
Counting the sheep in your field of forget-me-nots.
The same place you always hide.
Maybe one day I'll close the chapter,
But for now, I'll settle for rest and close my eyes.


Saturday, May 16, 2015

6:05 AM

Why is it that every time I miss you
You make it seem like a non-issue?

Why is it that every time I want to see you
It feels like I don't even have a way to reach you?

Why do you always go missing?
When you know my feelings are so insistent...

...consistent, persistent.
All three apply.
When it comes to you,
The well just won't run dry.
I dig deeper and deeper,
All I do is try.
All I want is a little reciprocity,
And you just can't seem to comply.
Caring defies logic,
Yet, on my feelings, you can rely.
I'm always interested in your conversation,
Yet, I never want to pry.
I also want to tell you that I don't care anymore,
But, I'm not one to tell such a stark lie.
I've always felt we could be something special,
That our story was written in the sky.
I've been vocal about it all;
I've heard nothing even close to a reply.
I wish you'd give me some answers;
Maybe things would be clear enough for me to say "goodbye."
Deep down, you know nothing keeps a gentle heart around
Like letting it spin its wheels on the endless carousel of "why."
Too kind to get fed up,
Too hopeful to let "maybe" pass by.
Such is the nature of our bond;
The complexity of you and I.
It could all be so simple,
But before you let me get close, you'd rather die.
And you're afraid that letting me in
Would allow me to learn why.


4:16 AM

My views on love
Have changed with the times.
Just maybe, you can change my mind.
It's tough out here.
Some bring old dirt into new homes;
Others shack up,
Just to more comfortably roam.
None of us really want to be alone,
But we don't even know how to thrive independently.
...which I suppose is why we develop dependency.
Feelings often seem mature
While connections are in their infancy.
Infatuation is just a matter of initial intensity,
Emotions overwhelmed by new stimulation.
Though sticky, it's a temporary situation;
That phase will give way to what's real,
Though that flame, that sensation
Should be a reminder of why both parties decided to build.
The thing is,
Someone worth the effort
Can be hard to find.
My views on love
Have changed with the times.
Just maybe, you can change my mind.
Dating often feels like work.
And no one wants to give effort to an eventual lost cause.
We should all put the prognostication on pause.
We're so afraid of having the rug pulled,
So afraid of getting hurt, we won't even text people first.
Forever misconstruing "thirst,"
Tainting the future by assuming the worst.
Quite a defense mechanism,
Seeing as we're not really afraid of those things.
What's truly scary is someone seeing our true, raw selves,
And knowing what that means.
Giving someone the power to cut where the scars already are,
And knowing what that brings.
That's a word we avoid, a word we deny,
A word that leads to stories of affection told from one side.
Miscommunication runs rampant,
Trust issues end up at an all-time high.
It can be difficult to find someone
That simply inspires me to try.
The thing is,
My views on love
Have changed with the times.
Just maybe, you can change my mind.


Friday, May 15, 2015

3:58 AM

I really do...
I still do.

I know I shouldn't,
But I still care.
The feelings
Those damn feelings
Still there.
Memories flicker
Like flames deep within in a cave;
I assume the winds of time will extinguish,
But they merely provide the sway.
Shadows dance along the walls,
And I care for you, yet another day.
We just couldn't get it right.
Attempting to connect
Was like trying to start a fire;
I suppose that's why sparks flew
I suppose that's why it burned us both.
I suppose that's why I still feel warmth,
When I hold those memories close.
Time may heal all wounds,
But it cannot make us immune
To the recurrent ache of heartbreak,
Nor spare us the gloom.
So, deep in the darkness of my scars
Where the light of learning a lesson can't reach,
Memories flicker
Like flames deep within a cave.
Still there.
Those damn feelings
The feelings.
I still care,
But, I know I shouldn't.

...yet, I still do.
I really do.