Sunday, February 28, 2010

A Freestyle Piece: Game Change - 2/28/10 (from 2/24/10)

"And so, I've turned 19...yet things are not as they might seem...older in age, yet younger at heart...my soul and mind are so far apart...grown man thoughts and childish smiles...all a bday does is change numbers on files...celebrate not my birth, but my progression...here to teach lessons, every piece is a session...wisdom bestowed becomes wisdom imparted...knowledge spreads, there is no way to retard it."

-A. Lewis

A Brief Philosophy: The Duality of the Mind - 2/28/10 (from 2/23/10)

"The mind can be a vessel of freedom, or an apparatus of confinement. Thoughts can ladders to greatness or fetters of mediocrity, notions can be doors to enlightenment or condemnations of ignorance. Input can fuel the passion to do, or fuel the fire of self-hate; output can be fuel for others, or a dark shroud. The beauty of such duality is the element of choice; but first, you must choose to believe you have one."

-A. Lewis

A Freestyle Piece: Love, In Our Fashion - 2/28/10 (from 2/19/10)

"...I just can't let you go...there's just too much love and I have yet to let you know...my feelings for you run so deep, to tell them I'd need a lifetime...when times get hard and I've played my last card, your love is my lifeline...our love fits like a pair of jeans...and so it seems that I can't sew these seams; your love is the thread, but the spool will run dead if you don't know these things..."

-A. Lewis

A Freestyle Piece: Mmm Mmm Mmm! - 2/28/10 (from 2/19/10)

"Be it lip to lip or hip to hip, our intimacy is a trip...one that I welcome. It allows me to fall into your love with reckless abandon, flailing while failing to keep any balance...the only harness that keeps me from falling too deep is the strength you keep...that reassuring embrace, those lips on my face, hands all over the place...it's as if you keep love in a box that reads 'just in case'..."

-A. Lewis

A Freestyle Piece: Try As We Might - 2/28/10 (from 2/19/10)

"We reached out, but could never make the connection...it felt as though our hearts had been met with dissection...but it was a demise that we crafted...out minds were too flawed to be intertwined and we couldn't get past it...I backpedaled as she ran, the synchronized speeds maintained the span...never in our might could we get it right, as peace (of mind) was the only way to win the fight..."

-A. Lewis

A Freestyle Piece: A King Is Crowned - 2/28/10 (from 2/19/10)

"...and as we embraced, fears were replaced...doubts and pouts ran out as smiles and affection converged on my soul with the utmost perfection...no words could form though my heart was effulgent with prose; begging to describe the feeling of love's healing...never could I feel down or alone because, you give me the crown of your own love..."

-A. Lewis

A Freestyle Piece: Never Reach - 2/28/10 (from 2/17/10)

"Love knows no alteration. You cannot change it, nor put it on a timetable. So for the women that rush, they run past it; for the men that backpedal, they never reach it. This leaves the two in a place where failure is imminent, and pain is likely. The land of mismanaged feelings is plagued by misunderstanding...the singular force that drives attraction asunder."

-A. Lewis

Friday, February 26, 2010

My Thoughts on Cheating - 2/26/10 (originally written on 12/21/09)

"There is no such thing as temptation; there are only times where repressed desires meet opportunity. And it is at those moments where you show your discipline, be it or strong or weak."

^ THAT'S how I feel about cheating. There is no excuse for it, nor is it ever copacetic. For some, the mere fact that we have propensities to do wrong and cannot escape them, aka "I'm only human," is enough to go cheat. Cheating really depends on someone's scruples...if your scruples can grasp on to the 'only human' notion, then you'll likely cheat. If you don't think that bf/gf relationships have any sanctity, then you'll likely cheat. If you were brought up around those that philander, then you'll likely cheat. Cheating is very relative, almost concomitant with one's scruples...the way you feel about lies, deception, etc. will rule how you conduct yourself, especially when it comes to cheating. To say that everyone cheats is true, but only when considering that we all have different definitions of what it is to cheat. My personal definition is "to violate the sanctity (both understood and agreed) of one's relationship."

-A. Lewis

Sunday, February 21, 2010

A Poem: The Eyes Have it - 2/21/10

Men try to rationalize telling rational lies,
Imagining ways to fool rational eyes,
You can never know where their rationale lies,
As they attempt to ration a lie.
Women begin to idolize when they sit with idle eyes,
Believing every man will say 'I do lies,'
While thinking that any man that would say 'I do...' lies.
The men you've dated have had their eyes on the prize,
Telling you the slyest lies to get your trust to rise
In a plot to get between your thighs.
Most would internalize these infernal lies,
But you spotted them with your internal eyes.
However.
Somewhere in the I-L-Y's
And the "why tell lies"
You've failed to surmise
That they truthfully told your lies.
You say you love you, but that's a lie in itself;
Your confidence is the grave and the shovel, it should lie in itself.
Deep within your soul lies sold lies
Sold to you by the old guys whose old tries
Have left you in shambles as your soul cries.
The love you've tried to give, that each guy denies
Is the love for which your soul cries;
Instead of giving it and having your soul pryed,
You should keep it and make it your sole pride.
Love yourself first, feel good on the inside
Then maybe your defenses won't be on the thin side
They'll be strong enough to let you know when to let a guy go,
But soft enough to let one earn his way inside.
Know where your heart lies,
And you'll cut down on the lies your heart buys
While continuing to make the good in your heart rise.
You'll increase your heart size while training your heart's eyes
To know when a guy starts lies.
But most importantly,
As you disband your own lies
Your insecurity dies,
And your soul dries,
Your future becomes bright like a sunrise
And finally peering through your own eyes,
You sit back and watch your own rise.


-A. Lewis

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

A Brief Philosophy: Light In The Dark - 2/17/10 (from 2/16/10)

"In life, we encounter dark times...but this is only for our own good. Darkness is sometimes laid upon us so that we can find our inner light to vanquish it. Darkness is never as opaque as it may seem; the eyes of wisdom see beyond all impediments through the twilight that lies between intelligence, knowledge, and faith."

-A. Lewis

A Freestyle Piece: Cut You Off (Snip, Snip) - 2/17/10 (from 2/16/10)

"I give everything but you give nothing...I receive apathy while you receive loving...You're never around but I'm always here...You confuse me, but it's time I made it clear. This isn't worth fighting for...you're no longer the one I adore...I just can't care anymore...I think it's time I cut you off (snip, snip) cut you off (snip, snip) cut you off..."

-A. Lewis

The Introspective Freestyles - 2/17/10 (from 2/14/10)

"I'm not a sophomore but I'm in the Talented Tenth; I keep my girls like I'm playing the Wii, at arms-length. Keep 'em at a distance so they don't get attached; like a ball sailing with no one open, I'm not trying to be a catch. I'm just trying to do me, I do that on my own; you're a great girl, but I'd rather be alone. My misery is no mystery; if I'm plan A, head to mission B since there's no use in missin' me."

"I'm hard on myself, so I don't care when you judge; talk to me and I'm like a rock, won't listen nor budge. There's nothing you've said that I haven't thought; I'm intelligent so of course my mind seems wrought. Troubled by choice, great by design; power through voice that comes from my mind. I desire to be better but give myself no time; which results in me being off like a sonnet with no rhyme. My mental maelstrom never seems to subside; the winds of pain gust by, sounding like a dove just cried."

-A. Lewis

A Freestyle Piece: Goaldiggers - 2/17/10 (from 2/12/10)

"Goaldiggers don't take you for your money, they take you for your traits; they know what you're capable of, so they stay around and wait. They don't see anything in themselves, so they want what they see in you; they think the world needs to pay for their bad dating experiences, and charge you what's due. Once they suck the good out of you it's on to the next; then you go to on to a good girl & inflict the effects."

-A. Lewis

A Freestyle Piece: Time - 2/17/10 (from 2/10/10)

"The clock ticks, but I don't care anymore...Your love is all I'm living for... I want your heart in my hand, you already have mine... I want you by my side for the rest of time. I'm down on one knee, as the clock strikes twelve... we've been together for a year, but deeper I'd like to delve... through the ups and downs we're here for each other... you're the one, I don't want another."

-A. Lewis

February Quotes - 2/17/10

"Knowledge is power; belief is command; intelligence is authority."

"We must do. Posture without action is no more concrete than a theory with no proof."

"Doubts are leaden weights that form in spaces that lack positive thinking."

-A. Lewis

A Brief Philosophy: Show and Tell - 2/17/10 (from 2/4/10)

"In life, people can pick up on what we show. However, they can see through all we do. That is because our minds govern our thoughts, which govern our actions. The things you do reflect your state of mind, be it flawed or malinformed. Any time we make a decision to act, we hold a mirror up to ourselves...it takes a strong person to look at it though."

-A. Lewis

A Freestyle Piece: Lost Woman - 2/17/09 (from 2/3/10)

"You can't be pissed at what you missed...while I was standing in front of you, you were looking back; by the time you turned around, the only thing to face were the facts. You were looking for me, but all you could see...was the mirror, your vanity showing you the person you've yet to be. You've yet to see how you are... the reason you're alone; I hope you see it before you're all gone."

-A. Lewis

A Freestyle Piece: Dark Woman - 2/17/10 (from 2/3/10)

"Your actions are dark, indicative of the pain that's been caused; your thoughts are manipulative, calculating, and dirty, indicative of the grimy things that have been done to you. There is a tint to everything you put out...no man can see your beauty through such opacity."

-A. Lewis

Random February Knowledge

"All I see are men that want companionship, and women that want commitment. Funny thing is, guys get mad when women aren't committed, and women get mad when men aren't companions. When two people aren't on the same page, they can tear through the book trying to get there...and usually they end up with deep emotional paper cuts. Maybe read the preface next time…read up before you end up with a crappy book."

"I wonder where vulnerability went...men have taken on this "there's more vagina than penis/I'm a commodity" mindset, to justify being players to prevent getting played or hurt. Women have taken on this "independent/bad b*tch" mindset to justify being single(and declining/using guys), and preventing being open enough to get played or even fall for a guy. All of these walls are boxing in hearts; and they're suffocating."

"Women will rush into relationships because they'll give a man the love they don't have for themselves...and expect to receive the love the should have for themselves. Men will avoid relationships because they take the maturity they don't have (which philandering supports), and because they are afraid of what love can do to them: make them vulnerable."

-A. Lewis

Friday, February 12, 2010

A Poem: Love Is A Battlefield - 2/12/10

I'm just making my everyday travels and what do I see?
A beautiful soldier limping past me...
Clothes tattered and bloody
Boots worn and muddy
It was apparent that her last battle had been awfully ugly.
The look on her face was not one of pain though...
Her sanguine-stained cheeks were filled with an anguish she sought to vanquish
And now too deep in this quest, she was beginning to languish
I could not conceive nor believe that this woman that looked to be kin to Eve
Only wanted love, yet men continued to bereave...
It made no sense.
But in my stupor, I made my way to her.
Never had I seen such erosion of character...
The bullet holes in her clothes showed that men had taken shots
But her bulletproof vest of confidence made sure she didn't get got
Her abdomen was the cleanest part of what was left of her uniform...
The arms she once hugged with were now dragging along
The smile that once shined forth was now lagging along,
With her entire demeanor. The meaner the enemies,
The harder she fought to love sensibly...
But those men were impossible...
They had hearts that weren't unlockable..
Waited until they got to know you before they began to show you,
That their blows weren't blockable.
Like spies on enemy sides, they took your info and used against you
But you were a true lover...putting your essence on the line in every fight you got into...
Your knuckles are bare...a pale representation of your true skin tone
And there are lines on your face...each place where your skin's gone.
Tears of acid did it to you...tears of pain and hurt covered in rain and dirt.
You were left to die after every battle
Each man leaving a scar like a brand on a cattle...
You limp, legs languid from standing up to near insurmountable lies
Your boots are hackneyed from kicking the BS back at these guys
But no other place is as affected as your eyes...
Once a beautiful color, but now as dull as a morning sky with no sunrise
Instead of the black and white you were given, you tried to see in hues
But in this vision logicality was missin', so you continued to lose...
It came to the point where you had to choose
Either start fighting back and make them pay their dues
Or remain idyllic and face near insufferable blues...
Ranging from sky to royal to navy, they came to down you
Reality came crashing down around you
Leaving lacerations all over...
But even then, you continued to fight.
Like a martyr for love, you were battling for what was right
What was YOUR right: the right to a good, honest love.
You've held up nicely, I must give you credit
But love is a battlefield, and I'm here to play medic.
Let's heal these wounds and make sure you convalesce
We're fighting for the same cause...maybe our hearts can coalesce.

-A. Lewis

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

A Poem: Playing With Fire - 2/10/10

I'm a passionate man with a passionate plan...
I wanna burn you with the passion at hand
It'll be like fire and brimstone once I put these lips on,
You.
Every time I touch you it's like an earthquake
Yet instead of tremors, waves of fire spread through you
This incalescent heat creates beads of sweat...
They provide no relief though
The further they slide, the further you hide
Hide from what's burning, yearning inside you.
More and more these searing pustules appear...
Bursting with the passion that's leaking out of you in more ways than one
Labored breathing is a sign that this favored meeting is bringing out your now tapered needing
Tapering towards a meeting of piping P's...
One slang and one official.
Ruby red rays of arousement now give way to scarlet sights
Tinged by the lust, darkness has befallen this starlit night
Your inhibitions are melting away
Following the suit of your clothing
The heat of passion is the Ace of Spades...
You don't want to follow suit but you're folding
I hold you tightly, and you feel as though Satan himself has you his grasp
Between the inferno and sins, your will bends, and you fail to hold a gasp...
The air is thick with dreams and desires
Smoke from our infernal internal fires
And you can't help but choke...
As though you've taken a hit of coke,
The smoke goes through respiration and hits your veins
Your resistance is eroded and your bad side is goaded
The gun has been loaded with no way for you to control it...
And as the last of your undergarments hit the floor...
BANG, you aren't that sweet neighborly girl anymore.
The insidious flames now play fastidious games
You are enraptured by your own libido
With the gunsmoke smothering your judgment, here we go...
Into my arms you lunge, lips scorching at mine
Hands became torches, lighting the way to what we wanted to find
Only the volcano awaited, our destination for the night
As we laid in it, we couldn't help but delight in our fiery plight
Every fire needs oxygen, and breathing was a cacophony of lust
The only thing in vision was the lascivious mission, our minds clouded by sulfuric dust
Constantly trying to please, we shifted like tectonic plates
Knowing full well that conflagrations were taking shape
There was an unbearable buildup, as sizzling love filled up
Body and mouth were as one, erupting simultaneously
And the fire soon died...but not without crackling heinously.
Your innocence lay listless in the ashes
A victim of us playing with fire...knowing our bodies are matches.

-A. Lewis

Monday, February 1, 2010

Just Freestyling - 2/1/10 from (1/31/10)

"I simply keep getting better with time; I pop bottles so the girls get wetter with wine/The thing is, they get wetter in time; So I tell 'em, your name would sound better with mine/One says, 'well either your bed or mine;' I reply 'your bed is fine'/We get there, and I quickly lay her down; I tell her 'I just wanted you safe and sound'/You're very drunk, so now go to sleep; I may be a player, but my morals run deep."

"They'll try me but stand right by me, my competition is spineless; you would think I don't wear a watch, my style is timeless. If you didn't catch that one, please rewind this; my pockets are going green, mental faucet flowing clean, no need to refine this. Your girl's mind is where mine is, plus what you'll find is your mind is what makes you a minus."

-A. Lewis

A Philosophy: Black Dating - 2/1/10 from (1/31/10)

"Pointing fingrs draws eyes." I mean that to say that if you're always pointing out a problem, you're doing nothing bu attracting attention to yourself as an unrealistic person that blames everything on others. Fingers find scapegoats. So black men, stop blaming Black women for your dating problems. It is a shared onus that neither side can singly correct.

We must exemplify the change we hope to see. If you're tired of women being whores, then stop treating and speaking to them as such; also encourage your guy friends to do the same. If you're tired of men being immature dogs, stop dealing with them. Men are pretty simple-minded, and if you stop dealing with them, they'll either wonder about it and change or stay the same. Very cut and dry. If you can get your fellow females to do the same, and that type of guy is PUBLICLY DETESTED and not simply absconded from, then he will have no choice but to change, or risk forever sticking with the foolish young girls that know no better. Change starts on the side from which you point. If women WERE to change, but men stayed the same, would the change not be in vain? They'd be even more amazing, yet they'd still be treated wrong...which would inevitably revert them back to their original state, with even more scorn, anger, and resentment than they originally harbored. The converse of that is true as well, as men would be especially dirty philanderers if they changed but ended up reverting back. Be and spread the change. No change can come of finger pointing. Like I said, fingers find scapegoats.

-A. Lewis

A Freestyle Piece: The Sound of A Broken Heart - 2/1/10 from (1/30/10)

"Piercing silence...a cacophony of incomplete thoughts...the crackling of burning dreams, going up in smoke...the percussion of tears falling on deaf ears...the clink of rose-colored glasses hitting the ground...a heart is broken, here is the sound...the wailing of a heart crying...the groans of feelings dying...the whistle of steam blowing...the bubbling of percolating blood flowing...sadness gives way to madness..."

-A. Lewis

My Personal Manifesto - 2/1/10 from (1/28/10)

"I can, I will, I must; not for me, but for He and those who instill their trust. Greatness is not mine alone to attain; I will reach it and make it everyone's gain. Failure is not an option, success is all but guaranteed; the path to it lies within and He is my lead. My character shall speak and my mind shall shine; I don't want to be the greatest, just the best of my time."

-A. Lewis

A Brief Philosophy: Love's Flow - 2/1/10 from (1/26/10)

"Love is a free flowing emotion. What does that mean? WE damn (dam) it through notions that divert, scars that prevent, and fears that diminish the flow. Love flows THROUGH us...that is why intimacy (hugs, kisses, etc.) feels the way it does...your love flows to and through another. Our souls run on the hydroelectricity of that flow; love makes happiness common and greatness constant."

-A. Lewis

The Sweetest Song - 2/1/10 (from 1/25/10)

"I don't wanna just do things for you, I wanna do things with you; It doesn't have to be just us, we can be out in public when I kiss you; You look great when we're out, but you're exceptional when we're laying around; I call you my lottery ticket, I covet you as the greatest thing I've ever found. I wanna give you 4 letters, and tell you 3 words; give my all 2 you, my number 1: the sweetest song you've ever heard."

-A. Lewis